Neil L. Andersen · Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
1Following the Savior’s incomparable love and sacrifice offered in the Garden of Gethsemane and on the cross, His lifeless body was securely sealed in a borrowed tomb. But the tomb could not contain the divine Son of God. “Why seek ye the living among the dead?” the angels declared. “He is not here, but is risen.”
2Because of our Savior’s victory over death and sin, we will praise His name forever.
3Jesus Christ brought other immeasurable blessings. He said to His Apostle Peter, “Whatsoever thou shalt bind on earth shall be bound in heaven.” The sacred sealing power has been restored to the earth and is found today in His dedicated temples. President Gordon B. Hinckley said, “If nothing else came out of all of the sorrow and travail and pain of the restoration than the sealing power of the holy priesthood to bind together families forever, it would have been worth all that it has cost.”
4In my 74 years, there are only a few experiences where nearly every emotion and feeling are solidly cemented in my conscious mind. One of the most poignant is as I knelt across the altar from Kathy in a holy temple of God. The hopes, the dreams, the love we shared all burst in a kaleidoscope of anticipation as we heard those unforgettable words: “for time and for all eternity.”
5To you in this vast worldwide congregation who lovingly remember that day in your life, I speak especially to you.
6At that moment, kneeling across the altar, we have a growing realization of the depth of our commitment to God and to each other. The sacred ordinance binds us together with our eternal companion and with God. We solemnly vow to keep the covenants, and the Lord promises us, as we are faithful, unspeakable blessings in mortality and beyond, including thrones, powers, and dominions in the eternal world.
7Our even greater hope, however, is a desire to refine our very nature, to become more like our Savior, allowing us one day to live with Him. Within our sacred marriage, bound to God and to each other, we find ourselves in a crucible of spiritual development where vital qualities—sacrifice, charity, patience, and being a peacemaker, as President Dallin H. Oaks spoke of this morning, the very character of Christ, as President D. Todd Christofferson said—can become a greater part of us.
8As we increase our love for the Savior, our love for each other grows. Like our own discipleship, our eternal marriage is not a short-term experiment but a journey, an eternal journey of becoming who God desires us to become.
9In much of the world, confidence in the lasting nature of marriage is eroding. In the gospel of Jesus Christ, we proclaim that “marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God.” We believe in eternal marriage, we teach of eternal marriage, and we seek an eternal marriage.
10We anticipate our marriage with faith and confidence because we conscientiously prepare for the covenants we make in the house of the Lord. In our youth, we strengthen our faith in Jesus Christ and keep His commandments, including the law of chastity, a law so many in the world have set aside. We take upon us the name of Jesus Christ.
11But even with our preparation, we of course each have weaknesses, and we realize that our lives will require more unselfishness, more repentance, and more forgiveness. Kathy and I had engraved on the paper napkins for our wedding reception these words of William Shakespeare: “Love is not love [that] alters when it alteration finds.” In those first months as she got to know me better, I kept the leftover napkins all around our apartment.
12While embracing the happiness and sorrows of life’s experiences, we etch our covenants indelibly upon our souls, and we keep our eyes focused heavenward, toward the glorious destination awaiting us. We know the divine attributes we seek will not all be perfected in this life. Eternal marriage is an eternal journey.
13We profoundly need the gift of the Holy Ghost in our personal lives and in our marriage. As has already been quoted in this conference, President Dallin H. Oaks recently said: “The adversary has become so effective at disguising truth that if you don’t have the Holy Ghost, you will be deceived. Many obstacles lie ahead. The distractions will be many.”
14One of the deceptions of the world is to discount the sacred importance and the actual power of the sealing ordinance. Keep your hope in each other and in Jesus Christ. His promises can see us through the obstacles and distractions.
15There are times in our marriage that require a stellar dose of patience.
16On our 25th wedding anniversary, Kathy and I were in Philadelphia speaking to missionaries. I received a call from President Boyd K. Packer of the Twelve. At the end of our conversation, I commented, “President Packer, today is our 25th wedding anniversary. Don’t you think that is a great accomplishment?” Without pausing, he responded, “It is for Kathy!” With your hope and faith in Christ, allow the Lord to expand your spiritual gifts of understanding and patience.
17In speaking about eternal marriage, let me mention two other issues.
18First, every true disciple of Jesus Christ, if it is his or her desire, will be eternally sealed to a righteous companion of his or her choosing throughout eternity, whether in this life or the next.
19Second, the question is asked, “Are there situations where divorce should be considered?” The answer is yes, there are, but the cautions are significant. I will include prophetic teachings on this subject in the published version of my message.
20Fifty years ago, Kathy and I met an impressive couple who had also been recently married in the house of the Lord. Life was promising. They had children. She was talented and full of faith. His work prospered. They kept their covenants.
21Unexpectedly, the young woman developed serious health issues.
22Their son recently shared these reflections with me:
23“In my younger years, my sweet mom went through crushing periods of severe depression, bringing extended periods of difficulty in taking care of even her own needs. It was a new reality for both of my parents. Life would be different than they had anticipated.
24“My dad had never experienced mental illness and sought the help of his Heavenly Father. I can’t count the number of times I walked in on him while on his knees, or the number of Sundays he was quietly fasting again. He served my mother—and served us—with incredible love, patience, and humility. He sought the influence of the Holy Ghost, hoping to love, act, and react as the Savior would.
25“My mother was the love of his life. These seasons would be but a small moment. They were bound to one another forever. As they remained faithful, they would spend eternity together in health and happiness. That promise gave him a perfect brightness of hope.
26“While many times my mother felt that her challenges created a burden for my dad, he saw it differently. He loved serving this incredible, precious daughter of God.
27“As my mom bravely—and miraculously—overcame many of her health struggles, they experienced light and joy together: as a couple and as parents and grandparents.
28“Later, in her 60s, she faced an entirely different set of trials, including breast cancer and neurological issues that impacted her ability to walk. Once again, she and my dad doubled down on their commitment to each other and their covenants with the Lord.
29“They did it together through the final day of her mortal journey.”
30Eternal marriage is an eternal journey.
31Who gives you the strength to hold tightly to each other and complete the mortal part of this eternal journey?
32“The everlasting God, … the Creator of the ends of the earth,” He who rose on the third day, “[He] fainteth not, neither is [He] weary. …
33“He giveth power [when you are] faint; and [when you] have no might [He] increaseth [your] strength. …
34“[And together, as you] wait upon the Lord … [you] shall mount up with wings as eagles; [together, you] shall run, and not be weary; and … walk, and not faint.”
35I solemnly testify of this sacred promise in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.